Kindness goes a long way

“Have courage and be kind.” – Cinderella (2015)

That is one of my favorite quotes and it comes from the live action remake of Cinderella.

This is a time of year when kindness, love and friendship should be cherished and abundant. Not to focus on gifts, money, the stress of travel, over commitments, frustration and impatience.

Life hasn’t been easy lately, adjusting to a third human in our home and figuring out this three kids under the age of four thing.

I still feel like the new girl, in our new home, at a new base.

Everything seems new. And hard.

Really hard.

I won’t lie, these three boys are more than I could have ever hoped for, but it is definitely a struggle. Lots of tantrums, nursing sessions, tears, toy throwing, refusing to eat, all the ins and outs of young children, plus stubborn teething toddlers and newborns. Each day, while a blessing, can feel like an uphill battle.

While I haven’t quite found my tribe, my people, my community here yet – I had two moments in the last couple weeks that reminded me how a simple act of kindness can change someone’s day.

I’d braved a trip to the commissary with all 3 kids in tow. My bigger two were in the cart (bless this commissary for having the shopping carts with the car/wheels for two kids attached to it – not sure how I’d survive otherwise!). But they were fighting. And had Go Go Gadget arms and were grabbing everything.

And the littlest was securely and snuggly cuddled up in my Boba wrap.

As we were getting to the checkout, fighting continued between the older two and I had to do some stern mothering. Which the resulted in toddler tears which woke the baby who proceeded to scream bloody murder through the last aisle, all the way to the check out.

He was loud.

I was totally embarrassed. I know kids cry, but we looked lot the chaos train rolling into the station.

The cashier in my lane, her bagger and the cashier in the next lane over who didn’t have a customer all came over, unloaded my cart and got me out of there quick as can be. The bagger chatted and played with the bigger boys while bagging the groceries, while I did an insane mommy dance and butt pat to try and get the little one to settle down long enough to get out of there.

They didn’t have to do it, they didn’t even ask if I needed help. The saw a mom with 3 kids acting like lunatics and did what they could to make my life just a bit easier. It wasn’t a big thing but I sure was grateful.

Today, we ventured to the exchange. Toddler running out of diapers, I needed out of the house, husband needed a few items and I DESPERATELY needed some coffee. I’d bribed the older two with a cake pop and with one on each hand on and one strapped to my chest we got my coffee, two cake pops and headed to get a cart.

But I made a mistake. And long story short my Peppermint Mocha ended up all over the floor of the exchange.

Beyond completely embarrassed, again, looking at the one little vice that was going to help me power through the rest of the day all over the floor had me nearly ready to boo hoo (I’d been up for 10 hours already and it was about 4 hours until bedtime…)

There had been several Australian service members inside the Bux when I’d gone in and out and had a great view of this minor catastrophe from the window. The next thing I know one of them came out with stack of napkins and very kindly said something along the lines of, he has 1 kiddo at home, I’m doing great being out with my 3 and he’d clean it up not to worry. He asked what I was drinking and next thing I know I have a new Peppermint Mocha in my hand.

He stopped to say hello to my boys, ask them their names and briefly tell me about his little kiddo he had at home and to wish us a good day.

My oldest, who had been asking a million questions on repeat about why my coffee was on the floor, stopped and said. Why did he bring you a coffee mama?

To be kind, sweetie. Just to be kind to another person.

In this season of life, and the time of year, everyone could use just a little bit more kindness.

Happy Holidays from our family to yours. Spread a little love, joy and kindness.

PCSing isn’t for the feint of heart

It’s that time, again.

Didn’t we just get here?

There are so many things we haven’t done. Haven’t explored.

What were we doing all of this time? Having more babies, apparently.

Yet here I am. Staring at all my crap, wondering how on earth it will fit in a smaller house. Wondering where I’ll give birth. Wondering if I’ll make friends quickly. Wondering if I’ll hate it.

I don’t want to go.

It sounds awful depending on who I ask.

Amazing if I ask others – but I find that hard to believe.

And all I can do, in this moment. Is cry. Both my babies took their first steps in this home. Our 3rd, kicking around and wiggling, will never know this place. Nor will he or she remember the next place. Maybe not even the place after that.

I’ve been asked, how do you do it? How do you deal with the changes? How do you cope?

The truth is. I don’t. We have no choice but to do it. And live through it. And finish it.

Because this is the life we’re in. This is the path we’ve landed on.

So for tonight, I’ll cry, staring at the spot my now 3 year old walked for the very first time. He probably won’t remember this home either.

But I will.

I always will.

Last Night Was a Good Night

There are some things that seem so distant, so unreachable, that you can never fully picture them.

You can’t visualize what something will be like because it seems so impossible.

But luckily for me, I had one of those magical, unreachable moments happen last night.

Every night when my husband is home, we put our sweet little guy to bed together.

Tonight I put him in jammies, we brushed his teeth and took him into his room. W read to him while I tried to snuggle him in his bed. Just like we do each night, but we swap, one reads while one stays.

But tonight L seemed like he wanted us both, so W laid down next to the bed so neither one of us had to leave him.

L wiggled and scooted around like he always does. But then…our Itty-Bitty started kicking. The strongest kicks I’ve felt with this pregnancy, high by my rib cage. I didn’t move for a moment, enjoying the happy baby.

I finally thought to get my husband’s attention, and he rested his hand there, and behold! A kick!  W hadn’t felt kicks like this yet. He’d been deployed almost my entire first pregnancy, coming home just days before the c-section. He’d felt movement then but not kicks like this.

This is never a position I thought I’d be in. Having my husband home is a novelty in itself it seems like. But cuddling with our sweet angel of a boy while he drifts off to sleep, while our second little miracle bounces around happily.

Thank goodness for these two little miracles we never thought we’d have.

Life as we know it

A lot has changed since I wrote my last post. For one thing, L is now 9 weeks old and totally amazing.

Next is that after my parents left, W’s mom came to visit, left and my mom came back. I definitely had some struggles and needed all the help we could get. So thank you moms for everything’s!

In addition to having a newborn and a c-section we’re in the middle of the moving process. We are leaving the beautiful island of Oahu and headed to California! I’m excited to be back in my home state, closer to my family and sadly still far (but closer still) to W’s family.

Our furniture has been packed and taken so we are living in a large empty house with a mattress on the floor, a small table with two metal chairs and two “easy chairs” if you can call them that.

We borrowed a coffee pot and a couple other items and bought some crappy stuff from Target to be able to sort of cook for ourselves while we repaint walls and wait for late August to come around. Then we should arrive around the same time our stuff does.

This also means not only do I never have free time (silly baby) but I also don’t really have a computer. So this post is coming from my iPad…I’ll be a little low tech in the picture department for awhile.

I’m hoping to sneak in a post during nap times so we’ll see if that works out, hope everyone is having a great week!
Xoxo,

Kayla