And when you’re not looking…

So I’ve been sitting on this post for a few months now because I wasn’t sure I even believed what was happening.

After all the struggles we went through to have our sweet L, we knew we would start thinking about a sibling sooner rather than later.

So in March I called a fertility clinic out here, since obviously we’d have to switch since the move from Hawaii.

We had an appointment scheduled for mid-May. I wasn’t sure I was ready to go through that process again, to put L through it. I didn’t like how I felt on Follistim and I hated the person I became during cycles, counting days, timing things, watching the clock. It was exhausting and I couldn’t imagine doing that with a one year old around.

But we scheduled the appointment, wanted to see what our options would be here, and hoped that we’d be adding to our family by the end of the year.

Instead, we had a little miracle happen.

At the beginning of May, I’d been feeling awful. Short of breath, dizzy, exhausted. Just not myself. I was getting ready to call a PCM because I knew something wasn’t quite right and I was just days away from running my first half marathon.

I took a test to rule that out because I knew in my gut there was no way. Not even an option with our issues.

I was shaking and confused when I saw, very clearly, a positive.

I remember falling to my knees and sobbing. Sweet L, with no idea what was happening, came over and hugged me. As I sat there and hugged him back I said thank you over and over and over to him, for helping fix whatever was broken with me. He healed my broken heart and his existence made this possible. He changed everything for us.

Here are some photos we shared of our sweet guy, telling the world what an awesome big brother he will be!

You Are Not Alone – our infertility journey

Infertility

For day 2 of National Infertility Awareness Week I wanted to share what we went through our on journey through infertility.

In April 2012 my husband and I decided hey, we’re ready to have a family. After a few months of just going with the flow I realized I needed to be a bit more in control and started sort of tracking things that were happening and realized something might be a little off.

By Christmas of that year, I was a disaster. I was becoming consumed with the fact that nothing was happening. I was frustrated, I was angry, confused and worried.

I spent many days crying that December, pretty much miserable to be around, making an ass of myself to people who I thought were my friends, I was all together a disaster.

In April of 2013 my husband left on deployment. It was awful to be apart from my best friend but at the same time it was almost a relief. No husband = no trying to conceive. For the first time in a year I wasn’t worried about if I was ovulating or not. I wasn’t losing my mind during the two week waiting window. I was just…me. A sad stressed version of myself but still me.

By the time the deployment was over I felt like I had my head on straight again and was completely ready to tackle things. I had blood work, ultrasounds and an HSG done on my end to see where we were at.

After reviewing our results our OBGYN prescribed Clomid. The two cycles we did Clomid, for me, was an absolute nightmare. I don’t know that I have ever been so sick.

After a discussion with my doctor we decided Clomid was not right for us. However the second cycle we were on with yielded a blessing and we found out on December 30th, 2013 that we were pregnant!

We were in disbelief. Did this really work? And it had! We were excited but extremely cautious. 10 days after we discovered our happy news we ended up in the ER with cramping and bleeding and it was like someone had popped a balloon.

The next few days were a blur. Physically I was in discomfort as I went through the miscarriage process. My doctor cleared me to go ahead and try again as soon as we felt ready.

After Clomid we tried Femara, which is similar to Clomid but without some of the major side effects and we saw no improvement.

Next we moved to the Fertility Institute of Hawaii to take the next step. They told us we had both male and female factors contributing to our issues and recommend we do IUIs (Intrauterine Insemination).

We did one month of medication only before going through our first IUI. We were prescribed Follistim which you self inject for a few days at beginning of the cycle to help with egg growth and egg stimulation.

We used this regiment in varying doses as determined by our doctors for five cycles throughout 2014.

In late August I went in for our third IUI…and I haven’t had to go back since. We have no idea how that cycle worked as our numbers were the worst they had been yet….but somehow everything aligned and now here we are, nine months later and less than four weeks away from our due date.

Check out Resolve.org for more information on how you can get involved or for resources on infertility. If you’d like more information from me on each of these tests and methods we tried, feel free to contact me!

Siggyforblog